Consensual sex among adults has been scientifically proven to be very beneficial to overall health, not just a means to keep the species going. Society does not like it when we air topics on bedroom matters and that is where the problem begins.

1. Immune System

Studies done on people who engage in sex regularly show that they have increased levels of immunoglobulin a.k.a an antibody whose work is to neutralize threats to the system; bacteria, viruses and other dangerous organisms.

2. Sex Lowers Stress

One of the most efficient ways to release, is to release literally lol Most modern diseases are caused primarily by stress and what better way to avoid disease than to strengthen your physical connection with your partner?

3. Sexercise

Intercourse is not the easiest of jobs and when more positions are involved, it can amount to a full work out, especially for the abs and back.

4. Prostate Cancer

You know this by know, that regular ejaculation (via sex or masturbation) helps prevent prostate cancer.

5. Better Sleep

This goes without saying, that orgasmic sex (not everyone will orgasm from sex) leads to better sleep for both parties as feel good and relaxation hormones get releases during and after the fact.

Now let’s get to the juicy stuff, am sure most guys just skipped the first segment of this post. The number of male clients and friends who nag me about sexual health is increasing alarmingly so I just had to do this, in fact sometime when am hanging out with friends watching formula 1 I sometimes feel like I am consulting with clients, less the pay. Anyway without further ado, I will clearly explain how to improve your sex life and your partner’s as well.


a. Love & Affection

Love makes the world go round and the more you give the more your receive. This is my first point because there is a strong connection between feelings and orgasms both male and female, which is one rare thing to hear about, since about 30% of women have only experienced the big O, men you need to step up. Ok, part of this is because of the laws of nature, the man has to finish first so that the species can survive and bla, but it is much better when all of you get off and are fully satisfied and love is the secret ingredient for that.

When there is more than just lust, the orgasm for BOTH men and women are much more intense and satisfactory, why cum while you could orgasm? tafakari

b. Foreplay

I remember watching connect on K24 and the lady used to say that women are like jikos (charcoal stoves) and men are like gas cookers. To turn on a woman needs time, patience and a little bit of skill, just like lighting up a jiko. A gas cooker just lights instantly and that is how men get aroused.

Men, take the time to ‘light up’ the fire in your woman, the best way to do this is by kissing, touching (ofcourse) and most importantly, oral sex. Yes I said it. In fact this is the best gift you can give your woman guys, EFF that expensive dinner at Tribe, just go down on her, selflessly and you too will get some, because women are known to exalt reciprocity more, you might get that killer BJ you always dream about haha .. am feeling dirty now but it has to be done, especially when I hear how little men know about the female body.

And don’t go for the kill directly, be coy, tease and have fun while at it. Start with the ears, neck and work your way down the breasts, ever heard of a nipplegarsm? By the time you get down there, it should as wet as a fish and now it is when you tongue works the magic. BUT first, tease around it, her thighs, knees, it’s about the journey, not the destination.

Eish, I cannot teach you the exact technique fellas but key thing is to lick, not eat literally, using your tongue and lips to pleasure everything. You can even throw in a finger or two and start working the g-spot, which will feel like the same texture of your tongue. Now take your time down there, the longer the better. She will now have experience miniature clitoral orgasms by the 5th minute if you can go for 20 – 30 minutes, you will rock her world. The more you woman has these clitoral orgasms, the more chances of getting the big vaginal orgasm (btw some women can only climax via cunnilingus and not penetration), plus the vagina will be more lubricated (her juices and your saliva than needed) for much longer so no need for cancerous lubes but if need be, coconut oil is the best natural lubricant that has no side effects.

c. Style & Positioning

There are sure-fire positions to achieve orgasms but the most common and practical one is the doggy style. This position just works because of deeper penetration and most importantly g-spot stimulation. The tricky part is that is also a major turn on for us men, I mean the view from the back is just amazingly incredible .. damn, what was I saying? Oh that is was hitting it from the back is such a turn on that it can make your guy climax before excepted so it is better to finish with it.

When it comes to style, I can blame mass media for this. On TV you will see a dude vigorously clear the desk, just to give it hard to the woman and we are left to assume that they pounded their way to euphoria. In essence, this type of ‘violent’ sex can even be harmful to both of your gentalia. Again, taking it slow is the best way to do it, remember jikos, not gas cookers. Most men love it slow and sure, sensual and loving, not pound-my-brains-off TV kinda sex. In fact this will make you fellas to come faster, which is one of the worst ego-killers and in the next and final bit I will let you know how to last longer.

d. Toy Up

In reality, not everyone can get laid regularly but you do need to de-stress on a reg and an interesting way to go is to get a sex toy. I know some people might be restricted to religion or personal stuff that they may be waiting for marriage or what not, this might be your best thing before that night in shining armor pops up in your radar. OH and I do not think it is a sin, I mean, God made us this way right, with the need to feel pleasure, so do not feel guilty or ashamed when you go to an online sex store to purchase that vibrator/dildo, trust me, you will never imagine you could have so much fun on your own.

There are toys for boys too, hehe how could there not be, but most of them are for women, which tells you how much women are not getting off with real sex.

e. How To Last Longer in Bed

The modern diet CANNOT SUSTAIN A HEALTHY SEX LIFE. It is that simple guys. The sodas, processed foods, binge drinking, cig smoking and pill popping just can’t cut it. To increase ‘nguvu za kiume’ you need to eat a balanced diet, rich in fresh fruit, green leafy vegetables (kale/terere.spinach) and drink plenty of water. You need to eat more whole grains like equatorial ugali afya, pearl barley, brown rice, brown chapati, brown fermented porridge and other good stuff like quinoa, buckwheat and spelt.

If you can get a juicer then you will never have to go through the embarrassment of purchasing viagra, just juice a watermelon and get your groove on. Beetroot + carrot + apple juices also double up as a natural performance enhancer. Cayenne pepper + lemon/lime juice + sea/Himalayan salt also improves blood circulation hence help with sustaining an erection for long.

Brisk walking outside in the open is also the best exercise for this because it helps with circulation around the groin area which ultimately helps you last longer.

Ladies, this is where you can help your men, instead of judging them and seeing them as weak, try cooking for them (if you cook) something healthier, like this kale recipe that I eat everyday which keeps me in top-notch form ;-). Encourage your men to go to the gym or take a walk together, at the end of the day, you will also suffer when he can’t get it up, which will kill his confidence and self-esteem.